Chaos with Cait

You are not worthless, and you are not small. The world just gets louder when it fears how powerful you truly are.

I did not grow tall, I grew true. I was bent by wild wind, there were times when I wanted to give in. But, my roots stayed strong. And so, I may be weathered and a little torn, but I have been reaching towards the sun anyways.

Forever isn’t long enough, if you ask me. Matter of fact, I don’t even know if “forever” is a real thing. What I do know is that in this life there are moments where I wish I could make the clock freeze. I want to bottle these moments of laughter, and joy. I want to keep them forever. Forever seems like a long time in theory. But have we ever even seen anyone make it there? I’m not sure I have. So, I have been choosing to live life a little more present. I have been slowing t

My heart is kind even after everything, that is where my magic rests. That is where I store all of the love, gratitude and tiny miracles inside of my chest

I sip the thought of you like a heated tea on a cold almost spring morning burning, but necessary. The thoughts consumed me, and suddenly I could no longer put my tea down. I found myself in a spiral of all the could haves, the should haves, or perhaps even the would haves. I started questioning things again, asking what could all this life stuff actually be about? I bet you think that I never think of you, but the truth is, that I do. And in the moments that I think of you

Hold on, love Take a moment, breathe. Because yes, the light is slower than the darkness. But still it never forgets its way back to you. Be steady, my darling Every shadow you have survived is proof that you were glowing even when you couldn’t see it. Your sunrise is coming, you have been devoted to your self growth and you have been patient. You have believed in your light and have chosen to always maintain it. Keep breathing. Keep hoping. Because the light is already on i

I kiss the air and imagine that the wind carries it to someone, somewhere who is aching too.

I stopped asking what would happen next and the air suddenly felt lighter. I started believing in my own steps. I started making decisions that felt good for me. I stopped worrying about what’s to come next, and started enjoying the very things that were present in front of me. From here, I laughed a little louder. And I recognized that my own mind was the one who was holding me captive. So I breathed a little more frequently, and learned to talk to myself quite gently. I rer

I am allowed to change, just like the seasons. So I am choosing to rewrite myself in sunlight. I am choosing to let go of all that I cannot control. I will be frolicking with whimsy again.

I didn’t know that healing could laugh until I heard it in my own voice. What a journey life has been. And still here I stand, with seasons now changed finally, ready to begin again.

A better world is coming. A world filled with love and acceptance. Wonder and imagination will run freely. Individuality is to be praised. So bring your rain and thunder, and let us dance our way through this change.

The air grows teeth, and I am chewed by the what ifs. “What if I fail?” “What if the vision takes too long to be materialized?” “What if I never make it?” “What if they laugh at me?” “What if I am misunderstood?” And then it hit me, that maybe, the teeth were mine all along.

I speak fluent hush, and the deep of the night understands me. The moon knows exactly what I mean, even when I choose to say nothing at all.

The thaw doesn’t happen all at once, because our bodies learn warmth in whispers. A fingertip twitches, your breath deepens. And then, finally the air softens around your being.

I don’t just want connection I crave it, like oxygen that I’ve somehow learned to ration.

Reality haunts me, but my dreams keep me alive.

Self love is not a luxury, it is your birthright. A promise that you will always belong to yourself first.

There is magic in the way that I forgive myself.

In the hush of morning light my teacup steams like a potion, whispering warmth into my palms. On some days, sidewalk cracks bloom with brave little flowers, tiny guardians of forgotten magic. Even the wind that wandering storyteller tucks secrets into my hair as I pass. And when the sun slips low, turning windows into molten gold, I remember. I remember that life doesn’t need grand miracles to be extraordinary. Life only needs one thing. And that is a heart, a heart that is w

Sleep is not rest for me. Sleep is just my quieter version of drowning.